My Ebenezer

“I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read in the train.” 
― Oscar Wilde, The Importance of Being Earnest

     Wow. This may be the longest break in Chronicling since I left off writing after student teaching. I apologize. My behaviour is unacceptable. I've strung you along for years only to leave you hanging for 8 months! I am ashamed. I shall endeavor to make up for it - at some point. However, if I may be allowed to simply compose a general and unpolished statement of praise and wonder this time and reserve all of my harrowing tales for another date. In fact, I had intended to relay some of my juicy details and hilarious anecdotes today, so I attempted to dig some up for you by pouring over my journal this morning; however, beginning in early March and reading through the tour season, I was struck by the resonating theme found in entry after entry: God's rich blessings and faithfulness. Amidst the humorous, the frustrating, the exciting, the victories and defeats, the highs and lows, the annoying people and new treasures, I saw a thread that wove them all together in a beautiful picture of how good my God is. Week after week I asked for God's strength to sustain, His light to shine, His truth to enlighten, His wisdom to guide, His mercy, His patience, His grace, and His love; and week after week He granted far above what I could ask or think! I asked for a wading pool, and I got an ocean! There were times when I could but sit and dwell upon the overwhelming goodness of God. There were moments when the reality of God's presence and the richness of His presents were too much for me to wrap my head around!

     If you don't keep a journal, I would encourage you to. Yes, it is tedious sometimes, and yes, sometimes you'll have nothing to say; but it's exactly those moments that are the best to reread. It's the seemingly insignificant that somehow become so important. You know, like in Literature class when your teacher points out all the little things you missed that were there for foreshadowing, or symbolism, or allusion - the rosebush, the shadowy figure, or the broken sword - that give the book or poem depth. Suddenly your life becomes a great novel when the monotonous routine or total stranger surprisingly turns out to be the inciting moment or the rising action. I once read somewhere that you don't recognise the significance of a hello until you have to say goodbye. [My life story!] So don't miss the importance of each moment, of each relationship, of each word: they're your story!


     I have to say, some of my own favourite journal entries are my panicked prayers right before a trip begins. I had eleven different tours this spring, and every time before I met those new people and implemented the new itinerary, I paused to pray: part freak out, part whimsical wondering. I would almost always question my ability to do what I do (FYI, I am nowhere near qualified in my own strength to do what I do!), and I would stop to examine who I was in that moment. The phrase "who will I be at the end of this week" was a favourite refrain of mine because I knew that on each tour I'd meet someone or face a situation that would forever change me. And at the end of each week, I'd look back at my apprehensions and curiosities and smile because once again God had been faithful and once again another brilliant chapter had been written. Those entries were like the "before" pictures, and I stood as the "after." 

   If I may quote my own self here as an example (this quotation comes post trip sometime in April):

"How blessed am I?! [...] How my future unfolds in such a sweet way! Every morning God's mercies are new. Every day God shows Himself faithful. Every trip, He reveals more of His character and love. I'm overwhelmed. I'm in awe of how blessed I am. And *who have I become since last week? A girl more confident in the goodness of God; a daughter more dependent on her Father; a Christian more in tune with her Family; an heir already claiming/enjoying bits of her inheritance; a lonely child who's found friendship in unsuspecting places.  
"God, I have to give you all the glory and praise! I never could have imagined how good the gifts are that you have given! [...] Here I raise my Ebeneezer - You are my help! You are my Rock. You are my faithful Friend and ever present Guide. You give wisdom when I am at a loss. You give love when I am faced with the unlovely. You give peace in the chaos and joy in the trials. Let your light & truth be visible in me."

     At this point, you may be wondering at my transparency. Who is this Corrie? you may ask. This is not what you were expecting, I'm sure! Well, this is a direct result of a lesson learned and a challenge meted to me while on tour this spring: the more transparent I am, the more the Light of Christ can shine through for His glory! So here I raise my Ebenezer, my "stone of remembrance," as a monument to my God, the Giver of all good things, who is the same yesterday, today, and forever. This is also my mile marker noting the distance I've come on this journey: "He who began a good work in me will bring it to completion." And this spring He used many a trial and blessing to prune and shape more into His perfect image - to Him be the glory! (and there's more to come ;)

"Then Samuel took a stone and set it up between Mispah and Shen, and called its name Ebenezer, saying, 'Thus far the Lord has helped us.'"

-I Samuel 7:12